the night of the north toronto fashion show.
myself, fitch, gott, shaun, and a guy named freudman were making our way downtown for an all ages party at some club. fitch had already had a bit to drink during halftime and the rest of us were just a little buzzed. walking towards the subway we decided fitch should be cut off. he didn't like that very much though so he an away onto young street and into oncoming traffic. we couldn't get the 26 of captain morgan's white rum away from him and although he was with us the whole time, he wouldn't let any of us get near him. i danked a bottle of wine on the ride down and everyone else drank too so we were quite smashed (keep in mind this was a few years ago). fitch continued to sit by himself and protect his 26 for the entire ride. we got onto a streetcar and i managed to get the cap of the bottle away from him. he didn't seem to notice though because every time he took a drink he would first unscrew the imaginary cap, and then put it back on. this is an excellent example of how drunk he really was.
we got to the club and were waiting in this big ass line when we decided to leave because of the huge wait. we tried to get fitch to come too but he wouldn't. so we started to drag him away. after a very long and tedious time getting fitch to this parking lot we realized that shaun was missing and so gott went to find him. so there i am, in this parking lot with fitch, who at this point is passing in and out of consciousness. gott comes back with campbell and we drag fitch to try and get a cab. somewhere in the rocess he grabs a wire from a green p sign and rips it out. so now there's a live wire jumping around in front of this bar and people are scrambling to get out of the way. we try to get fitch a cab but he's too drunk so we get a cop to call us an ambulance. at this point fitch is on the sidewalk passed out and covered in his own piss and i am no longer drunk. turns out seeing your friend get alcohol poisoning is quite the buzz kill. the ambulance gets there and after many jokes at fitch's expense they get him onto the stretcher and he throws up. gott goes with him to the hospital and calls his dad who thinks it's a prank call. the next morning fitch wakes up in a diaper.
so after they leave, campbell and i go back to the club and get in because the line is so small. inside, i run into none other than lois einhorn himself. i tell him about fitch and we have a good laugh. at some point in the night i find campbell at the bar with blood all over his face. turns out he got sucker punched by some asshole and then kicked in the face repeatedly by a group of people. i'm still not sure why but whatever. so i leave with campbell and he goes to the hospital to get stitches (not the same hospital though).
if your wondering where freudman was in all this. he stayed at the club until closing and then jogged home. yes jogged.
i don't drink rum anymore